I Heard There Is Joy Untold

Hung Up (Rock Mix) - Watch out for the sexy(!) guitar interlude and yes, FUCK THE PRESENT!!!

Repulsion (UK, 1965) - Polanski's first English language film is a psychological horror... It tells of a sexually repressed manicurist played by a very hot Catherine Deneuve... This would be one of the very first times cinema has taken an audience inside the mind of a schizophrenic killer and it is quite a ride... The black and white photography here has made history and let's just say it's good enough a reason for anyone to run and watch this. Polanski's shots are incredible and to think that he was only following his instincts... It's very disturbing and extremely sophisticated for its time... I'm glad I'm not into eating rabbit and absolutely loved all the wall cracking hands-grabbing action... Virginal (?) madness! May Polanski be praised!

Knife in the Water (Nóz w wodzie, Poland, 1962) - Polanski's first feature film impressed the world and would probably have taken the Oscar for Best Foreign Film in 1964 hadn't Fellini's 8 1/2 (one of my favourite films of all time) been part of the competition. It's such a simple story... A couple pick up a hitchhiker and take him on board their sailboat for the weekend... Slowly the air begins to thicken... There's an incredible battle of egos filled with eroticism, mind games, subtle violence and the struggle between classes and emotions. The male psyche is the subject here... Polanski was not attractive enough for the role of the young hitchhiker but dubbed the character's voice... He confessed later that he struggled to get good performances out of the actors, especially from the pretty leading lady Jolanta Umecka. If the acting is not superb, Polanski can rest assured that his camerawork is fucking amazing... This film not only put his name on the map but also brought international attention to Polish cinema...  Many will say it's boring and too arty so please remember he also made The Ninth Gate with Johnny Depp, watch that instead and shut up!      

Viridiana ( Spain, 1961) - It was very nice of the La Mirada - Jewels of Spanish Cinema crew to show this as their mystery film (AND gives us copies of the handwritten note by Paul Aster who picked the film in honour of his mother)... It was even nicer that Jemma "made" me go and attend the session... After all, Viridiana is considered (by many) the best Spanish film of all time and after watching it I couldn't agree more... The print was in a fine state and to watch it at ACMI (the best cinemas in Australia, in my opinion) was quite the treat! For starters, it is directed by Luis Buñuel who is a genius of cinema himself and, of course, this film has driven the Vatican mad and it was banned in Spain til 1977 for its "blasphemy" and "obscenity". Bring it on! Hahahaha... Viridiana is an aspiring nun, a spiritual idealist who is eventually corrupted when visiting her uncle...  The impossibility of making a significant difference in the world... Buñuel was not afraid of expressing his views about the ugliness of being human... He has also confessed that this film had been inspired by a recurring erotic dream he had in which he was having sexual intercourse with a very drugged Queen of Spain. Hahaha.... And of course, this was the best thing he could have offered Franco when asked to return Spain. The film is full of symbolism and it is the outrageous banquet scene that will always stay with you - beggars and thieves playing out The Last Supper by Da Vinci...  But one cannot let the Don Jaime's foot fetish and the sexually repressed Viridiana milking a cow scene pass by without notice... Buñuel remains one of the most provocative directors in history and his sarcasm towards absolute religious charity seen here is still deliciously fun. This is a must-see! Buy me a copy NOW!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Amadeus ( Peter Schaffer's Amadeus: Director's Cut, USA, 1984) - I have always avoided watching this because it is a film about Mozart, Salieri and classical music... Not that I don't like them but I couldn't help but thinking I was in for a BBC afternoon style documentary... You know those with awful reenactment scenes?! Well... I was bored enough and the DVD was sitting right there in front of me so I thought " Holy Fuck! 8 oscars??? Milos Forman??? Why not???" and I've always wanted to watch it, when I was a kid I loved the cover... It turns out this film is far from being a boring composer biopic... In fact, it is so much fun... I laughed! I was not expecting to even smile and there I was... thoroughly entertained! It is a very clever screenplay... Who would've thought of making Salieri Mozart's killer because he was so jealous of his genius? Peter Schaffer, being the answer... The costumes and art direction are to die for! It made me wanna eat Nipples of Venus! The acting is excellent, even the extras are amazing in this ( I kid you not! Oscars for all the extras!) and how could the acting suck when Milos Forman (possibly the most anal director when it comes to casting) is in charge? Someone please bring back F. Murray Abraham! A rare cinematic experience in which everything works magically... I want a new mobile phone just so I can record Tom Hulce's "infectious giddy" "like metal scraping glass" laugh as my message ringtone... Hahaha!

 

 

 

 

 

 

O Crime do Padre Amaro ( Portugal, 2005) - I am not a fan of TV interfering with cinema... There are exceptions to the rule but usually the outcome is pretty crap because TV is always crap... Having said that, this film was originally meant to be a TV mini-series for Portuguese network SIC but thankfully someone thought it'd be better to cut it a bit and release it on cinemas... They were right... It became the most successful Portuguese film of all time in Portuguese box-office history. And then, it migrated to the magic boxes in 4 episodes with more than 1 hour worth of "deleted scenes". Hahaha... The novel by Eça de Queirós is a classic and has been adapted to the silver screen before ( Gael Garcia Bernal stars in one of them) but here it gets a contemporary approach... Meaning lots of hot sex, nudity, hip hop, guns and violence have been added to it... not to mention the Catholic priests are portrayed as complete arseholes... Catholic church says "Ouch!" but I'm sure Catholic audiences were curious enough to attend and left pretty pleased after seeing the hot priest interfere with ex-supermodel turned into actress Soraia Chaves in various different positions and locations - the church itself being one hot spot ( Soraia Chaves has since gone to star in more sexy flicks, Call Girl being the latest and apparently a superior film).  Basically, I think this works fine in TV screens but it's very poor cinema... Fucking soap opera style shit should NOT fucking migrate to theatres because there is enough shit cinema around... Thanks very much! The theme song pops in everytime there is a change of scenery, the characters are pure stereotypes and there's very little of the book left in the story... The acting is not too bad but Jesus still needs to save the day...  Pretty disgusting to borrow the work of Eça de Queirós and use it as an excuse to bring in the lost sheep to cinemas when it's gonna be shown on TV anyways... If you watched this at a cinema you are probably gonna end up in hell! And you deserve it... you were looking at Chaves' tits MAGNIFIED... Uh huh! Bad boy! Bad boy!

 

 

 

 

 

  

Sophie Scholl: The Final Days (Sophie Scholl: Die letzten Tage, Germany, 2005) - A great film about anti-Nazi German hero, Sophie Scholl... A young bright German student that dared to rebel against Hitler and ultimately died as a result of it. Sophie Scholl and her fellows from the White Rose underground resistance network are considered heroes in Germany today and so they should. Much to the aid of director Marc Rothemund and his script are the historical records that have since their incarceration come to light. Julia Jentsch is splendid as the title character and took home many awards, including the Silver Bear. Audiences are sure to connect with her story... It's a pretty conventional approach by Rothemund but one cannot ignore the tension of the interrogation scenes... No surprises but certainly worth your time.

 

      

 

 

 

Marie Antoinette (Japan/France/USA, 2006) - It is either love or hate with this one... I am not sure how I feel about it just yet... However, I must say I like when a film divides its audiences like that. It was booed at Cannes if you must know... The one thing that you should have no doubts about would be the art direction, the fabulous costumes and production design. Now... as far as being historically accurate, well... I don't think it was Sofia Coppola's only intention and I think much about the history of Marie Antoinette's life is speculated anyways. I'd prefer to take this as a film about a girl who's a bit lost in a fascinating world ( you thought I'd say Translation, huh?!), she is just a girl... I repeat. Isn't that complicated enough?! Some have bitched about the use of contemporary music in the film ( how can anyone bitch about Air, The Cure, The Strokes, Bow Wow Wow??? It's the coolest soundtrack!) but I love it! I think it works! I think we, the people of the present, should be able to connect with them, the people of the past! Times haven't changed much, after all... Have they? Is there a bit of Paris Hilton in Marie Antoinette? I think so... and this is no documentary for French TV, is it?! The acting is a bit all over the place but overall it doesn't disappoint... I think it's interesting work coming from Sofia Coppola once again and this time I'm sure she will gain a whole new legion of girl and gay fans. Oh, it made me wanna eat cake!

 

    

 

 

 

 

Romper Stomper (Australia, 1992) - Let's just say xenophobia, incest, gang violence, neo-nazism and some of the other themes seen here are very serious issues... Now I'm not really sure of how I feel about Melbournian Geoffrey Wright grabbing these "hot topics" and throwing them all into a film that has very little to say about what is showing... It is brutal, confronting and very violent indeed... but??? I think it's really lazy to get a bunch of psychoes and blood splattering everywhere just for the sake of it... I don't give a shit if Mr. Wright claims he had no agenda other than being authentic... I mean, do people really go out on the street paying to see a bunch of skinheads and Vietnamese kill each other with an added epileptic upper middle class bitch providing sexual fun on the side??? I'm sorry but I think it's too easy a formula and wasn't very convinced. Luckily, there is a very talented cast... Russell Crowe (who ended up being spotted by Sharon Stone and taken to Hollywood after she watched this and insisted that he'd be cast in that bad western of hers, The Quick and the Dead) and Jacqueline McKenzie are great and almost save the day! Yes, it is an intense film and it does deserve its cult status cos of Crowe... I think there's definitely something big missing tho...

 

     

 

 

 

 

 

The Bubble (Ba-Huah, Israel, 2006) - Yet another very cool queer film from Israeli director Eytan Fox. This time we follow a group of young friends on the trendy side of Tel Aviv. It's a lighter film if compared to Fox's previous efforts but it's still involving and who could resist a love story between an Israeli and a Palestinian man? Ok, that was a very stupid question! The Hamas certainly would! The message is quite simple and classic Make Love Not War! and it may disappoint those who are looking for an in-depth look at the situation in the Middle East... Personally, I think there are plenty of films which already do that and I am always satisfied when I see films that deal with the conflicts in the region in a more positive way... Although, it's not pretty when the bubble in question here bursts! The soundtrack is fantastic and includes The Smiths, Belle & Sebastian and even Brazilian sensation Bebel Gilberto. A hit in Gay and Lesbian Film Festivals around the world... I'd say the homo-eroticism and good melodrama combo may have helped a lot with that.

 

 

 

 

 

Taxidermia (Hungary/Austria/France, 2006) - First things first... I will never ever forget this movie... Why? Because it's fucking gross! And don't get me wrong when I say: "in a good way". To watch this you will need to have a strong stomach, especially during the second act... It is definitely one of the most controversial films released in 2006... It tells the stories of three men from different generations and of the same family... If I try and explain it to you it probably wouldn't work... but I'll try anyways... The grandfather (in the Second World War) is a masturbator but his sex expells fire, ladies and gentlemen... I suppose he wants some loving! When he finds it, the father is born... He's a champion of the competitive eating circuit and strives for success... the grandson is a taxidermist and I shouldn't tell you what he's up to but can confirm he's after immortality... It may sound weird, but when you actually see it you'll wish it was ONLY weird. The special effects and the cinematography in this are fucking amazing... The acting is superb... the music score is by Brazilian electronic music producer AMON TOBIN!!! It's one of the most inventive films I have seen in recent times. It defies genre... It's horror, drama, comedy, etc...  Director György Pálfi has created a fantastic universe... It's bizarre, grotesque and even pornographic in its depiction of the human body. I absolutely love when I watch something different and unique... Definitely worth a look! You will never forget this...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Clubland (Australia, 2007) - Or if you live in the U.S., you might know this as Introducing the Dwights (apparently more commercially viable). It's yet another coming-of-age affair (in a dysfunctional family, of course) drama/comedy made in Australia that shouldn't really be treated as just another fish swimming in the water, or should it? There are some really strong performances here, Brenda Blethyn is perfectly cast as an aging comedian/mother, Emma Booth emerges as a revelation (she's already Hollywood material) and Khan Chittenden is not all about the cuteness (at least he does a better job than Richard Wilson). The script may seem implausible at times but it is still entertaining if you fall for the characters. I liked seeing Cherie Nowlan back in action, I hope it's not another ten years before we can experience one of her films again.

 

 

 

 

 

Little Red Flowers (Kan shang qu hen mei, China/Italy, 2006) - Very sweet little film about a four year old boy who puts the k in kindergarten. Set in the 1950s or possibly 1960s (it's not stated in the film), it also works for grown-ups with its mature themes and investigations. It's irresistible and Yuan Zhang did a fantastic job of working with the kids, they are all very natural. Trouble in paradise arises from the narrative that eventually loses direction but there are some unforgettable scenes to make up for it. Also an essential for those interested in themes like individualism and conformity. The cinematography is remarkable... Not made for kids but it could possibly work as a family movie... Teachers will absolutely love it...

 

    

 

 

 

 

 

Welcome to Woop Woop (Australia/UK, 1997) - It's hard to believe this comes from the same director of The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert... Yobbo fest at its most extreme... It feels just like any crappy Australian film from the 70s or the 80s... It's funny at times, there's Susie Porter and that's about it... An oddball really... Nice costumes and all (viva the op shop!!!) but did not impress me much. What was the point here? Also, not a fan of Johnathon Schaech... Anyone thinking of visiting Australia should see it... hahaha...

 

   

 

 

 

 

 

Mad Hot Ballroom (USA, 2005) - For those who can't get enough of the recent reality TV shows on dance, before the boom there was this documentary about 5th graders in American public schools learning to tango (and etc) with a ballroom dancing program... The schools we see here are all quite different and that's probably the best thing about the film because the kids often talk about their realities. Marilyn Agrelo is lucky to have found a good bunch of smart and talented children... They are captivating and work better than any narrator in telling their own stories. You don't necessarily have to like ballroom dancing (and children, dare I say) to enjoy this. A total feelgood flick... " Anyone can make it if they know how to shake it". It is never too late to do the mambo, huh?!

 

         

 

 

 

 

 

Samba Chanson (Samba Canção, Brazil, 2002) - A Brazilian film from Minas Gerais it's a rarity these days... Not from RJ or SP, I repeat... It tells of how arduous it is to make a first feature film in Brazil. It's a comedy and it's quite inventive in its use of different types of cinematography switching to 16mm, Super 8, Video, colour and black-and-white... The acting and the script are a bit ordinary and sometimes it feels like it was made for film industry insiders rather than the general public but everyone should get at least one laugh out of it (thanks to Teuda Bara)... Rafael Conde loves Brazilian marginal cinema and he's paying tribute to it with the inclusions of Ze do Caixao -also known outside Brazil as Coffin Joe ( this year's Melbourne Latin American Film Festival screened an excellent doco on him and also one of his most well-known features) and Guara Rodrigues ( a darling of Brazilian arthouse directors). Most of the actors come from the theatre stages of Minas Gerais, something that you may notice whilst watching this... Personally I didn't really like this very much... It's a great idea to make a film on a low budget about a film that is being made with no budget at all and then travel from documentary to cheap humour and horror-trash but I feel that there was the plan of celebrating originality, invention, creativity and the pleasures of film making and that didn't really come across very well... Not when there's a stupid plot about a lab to make soap that in the end produces a film monster... One could make all sorts of academic assumptions and claim it the perfect metaphor when truly it is just a load of shit... This is not the sort of film Brazil needs to be producing at the moment... It already struggles with the commercial crap made by Globo and SBT (and soon other TV networks) and it would be a terrible idea to have to put up with the chanchada again, especially if it's disguised as intelligent...

 

 

 

   

 

 

Holy Smoke (USA/Australia, 1999) - This may be a little messy but it's not too bad. I suppose Jane Campion had too much on her hands and maybe that's why it didn't turn out as homogenic as it should've been... We follow Aussie middle class whitey Ruth Barron (played by Kate Winslet) to India where she finds herself spiritually - much to her bogan family's despair. She's dragged back home to be deprogrammed by an American cult-exiter, P.J. (played by Harvey Keitel). The film's first quarter is pure Aussie comedy and then it just goes on a completely different and serious tangent with Winslet and Keitel locked up in a house in the middle of the desert having deep and meaningful conversations til finally the "deep" gets too literal, if you know what I mean. Basically, the themes exercised are existence, purpose, the roles of men and women in the planet and all that alpha male and feminism issues we all love to dwell on. It's pretty hard to believe these characters and the script... But there are some really cool effects by Animal Logic, a naked Kate Winslet pissing herself (with pee! not laughter) into the arms of a very horny Harvey Keitel, Sophie Lee performing a hysterical fellatio, beautiful cinematography by Dion Beebe, a cool soundtrack featuring Kate Winslet going nuts to the sounds of Alanis Morissette and the classic line " Thank God It's Qantas!"... and I couldn't forget to mention Harvey Keitel in drag... So... worth a look, innit?!

 

 

 

  

 

 

Grey Gardens (USA, 1975) - Possibly the most haunting doco I have ever seen. The creatures in question are Edith Bouvier Beale, mother and daughter, Big Edie and Little Edie, sharing not only the same exact name but also the same squalor. They are relatives of Jackie Onassis... Their house is falling apart with cats shitting everywhere and racoons living in the attic. It's a timeless love-hate relationship and it has divided many for it is one of the very first human interest successful documentaries. Famous for being Jackie O's dark dirty secret but seducing a legion of fans with its rawness and staunchinesse... True Cinema. Exploitative? Were the directors filthy voyeurs? I think they felt the call for a story that needed to be told... No harm in that when the subject is happy to be exposed. Time is also quite the subject here... as this house seems to float in a time warp. It's hard to resist the charm and the sweet difference of the Beales, they are unique. It should state that "it is actually a true story" because one wouldn't have guessed it. The film is now a classic cult movie and has been turned into a musical both Off-Broadway and soon-to-be-in-Broadway and it's also now gaining a fiction film version starring Jessica Lange and Drew Barrymore premiering later this year. 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

Alpha Dog (USA, 2006) - One of those "based on true events" but not really... Subject: one of the youngest men to have made to the F.B.I's most wanted list who was eventually caught in Brazil in 2005. Although in the film they say it's Ecuador. So this is the story of a drug dealer and also the mastermind of the killing of the teenage brother of one his clients who just happened to owe him some dough. But before dying the kid had the time of his life (how's losing your virginity to not one - but two - hot blonde chicks in a pool?! As in... threesome!). There were a few other members of the gang involved in the incident who also got in big trouble and are still behind bars. It stars a good bunch but it's probably the doida varrida played by Sharon Stone in a fat suit that will always stick with you (for better or worse). There's also a boring Bruce Willis, a Justin Timberlake covered in tattoos. a (too)focused Ben Foster and the next big thing Emile Hirsch. If you're into crime shows this might just be your thing. Not a bad film, just another one.