Still Walking ( Aruitemo aruitemo, Japan, 2008) – Very simple film about a complex family… As they once again (for the 15th year) come together to “celebrate” the death of their first-born son ( killed trying to rescue a chubby friend who was drowning and probably a little too chubby to handle!). Hirokazu Kore-eda is clearly inspired by his personal life and shies away from big scandalous melodramatic scenes… The guy ain’t afraid to show that families can be cruel too! It may be yet another family drama, but it is a very subtle one… A really beautiful film! After seeing it tho, every now and then I get a little freaked out when I see a yellow butterfly and am bit obsessed with squeaky-voiced actress You! It might be a bit too long for people who get bored easily... It made me wish soap operas were this sophisticated...

Land of Madness ( La Terre de La Folie, France, 2009) - Twisted doco about twisted people living around the Southern Alps in France... It's quite funny and intriguing... I haven't heard much about Luc Moullet but he seems to be eccentric enough to make you "believe" his pentagon of madness. It made me feel normal and less afraid of South Australia. A good watch if you're into black humour!

Celia: The Queen ( USA, 2008) - Compulsory viewing for fans of legendary Celia Cruz! Azucar!!! It broke my heart because I did NOT know she is dead! I know... What world am I living in? It's not much of a biopic but rather a celebration of her music and spirit. There's plenty of rare footage and interviews with big names like Andy Garcia, Gloria Estefan, Wyclef Jean, Quincy Jones and the list goes on... I was possibly the youngest audience member and must admit watching the oldies dancing and tapping their feet on the seats was the cutest thing I experienced during the festival. It's as contagious as Celia's voice... Hold tight to your seat until the very end of the final credits to be surprised by an incredibly personal moment, too raw to be subtitled, lucky for those who speak Spanish...

Tales from the Golden Age ( Amintiri din epoca de aur, Romania, 2009) - Must warn I had to miss one of the episodes because the film was too long and I had another session being introduced by the filmmaker happening next... Must also tell that there was no point in missing it because this next session was running late! Murphy's Law!!! This was one of the films I was dying to watch because I really loved Mungiu's 4 Months, 3 Weeks & 2 Days and had heard so much about this one... It's a lot lighter and super fun! I love when people can see the good in something bad, so these legends, all taken from the very tough times of Romanian communism, make people laugh outloud about situations that aren't meant to be funny were really my cup of tea. Best of all, Mungiu is more than happy to share credits with fellow Romanian filmmakers and audiences must guess which of the 5 directors directed each legend... A very good exercise... For me it is difficult to pick a favourite legend, or even a less favourite... There's definitely something magical about the whole thing! This is precisely the type of cinema we need out there... Enough angst and intellectual masturbation, please! One of my top favourite films at this year's festival!

We Live in Public ( USA, 2009) - Have you ever heard of Josh Harris? No... well, think Bill Gates on acid and single! This forgotten "cyber kid" is truly bizarre and made millions of dollars with the internet before it had even hit my classroom ( during primary school!). Harris was, perhaps, as the doco tries to put, a visionary. He was a pioneer of social networking - creating, doing and practicing what we all do now on Facebook, Twitter,YouTube, MySpace (does it still count?!), Bebo, Orkut, Hi5 ( do they still count?), etc etc... Ondi Timoner happened to be at the right places at the right time and it's no coincidence this film had to be released NOW! She was there for Pseudo, a precursor to YouTube founded by Harris, then got involved in "Quiet", a bunker in New York ( again created by Harris) where random people experienced a real-life-Facebook-mixed-with-YouTube-kinda-living arrangement that has to be seen to be believed (Imagine being tagged daily whilst having a shower and not having any privacy settings to protect yourself! Yeah, you got friends that would love that shower?! Precisely!). "Quiet" is the most interesting bit of the movie... To think it really happened... Finally, Timoner was also there to document We Live in Public, when Josh Harris decided that 15 minutes of fame were just not enough and decided to broadcast his life on the internet 24/7. As it turned out, 10 years later, we can all relate to some of these experiments... Timoner employs many tricks to keep us interested and she tries hard to understand/explain her subject, even by including his fucked up relationship with his mother, his obsession with Gilligan's Island and footage of his creepy alter-ego 'Luvvy'... But the man is a total nutjob and too hard to translate to screens (maybe that's why he videotaped himself so much)... The film will spark a valid debate about the way we're living today and how technology is shaping humanity - that is all that really matters... People need to be a little more careful with the information they share online and this will show how bad things can get if they don't! Timoner truly deserved the Grand Jury prize in Sundance as she had, for starters, over 5000 hours of footage to deal with... I cannot forget mentioning the absolute gem of a soundtrack, thanks to a very successful DiG! Timoner introduced the film and spoke at the Q&A afterwards, she was pretty cool and revealed that big things will possibly happen with the film... like an internet launch possibly featuring Trent Reznor?! If I were you I'd become a fan of the film on Facebook or follow her on Twitter... She is also living in public!

Home ( Switzerland/France/Belgium, 2008) – Taking the road movie to a whole new level (perhaps into reverse mode…), Ursula Meier’s debut feature was my first pleasantly surprising experience at this year’s festival. Family dramas aplenty always at a theatre near us, it was really quite refreshing to see something different and decidedly offbeat. I knew very little about the film before sitting through it… That is something that usually happens when I see Isabelle Huppert’s name attached to a project, it means I will watch it someday, no matter what! She is stupendous as usual but all other performances, including those of the kids, are just as good... errr, excellent even! But, back to not knowing much about the film… I guess that is why I was so glad I watched it and it’s also the reason why I won’t describe any of the plot elements… It would probably not sound as interesting! I can say, however, that it’s all about contemporary life and our endless pursuit of progress… I can also say that it will make you laugh, that it’s not one wanky intellectual exercise and that it will hit you like a truck! One of my top favourite films at this year’s festival!

About Elly ( Darbareye Elly, Iran, 2009) – Iranian cinema just got a bit more diverse with this Asghar Farhadi’s mysterious new film… Farhadi is not afraid of focusing his lenses on the middle-class of today’s Iran, something that is a rare treat for anyone who is interested in the incredible films made there. It’s also quite universal as morality issues are not exclusive to Iran. We’re presented with a very complex story about seemingly harmless lies, friendship and gender roles as a group of friends takes a holiday in the Caspian Sea. Things go horribly wrong as they try to maintain their social customs and soon enough they’ll learn that Newton’s action-reaction law never fails. It’s not a film about physics, by the way… It’s more of a psychological fare than anything. It’s a very strong film… It starts very lightly (some people might actually struggle during the first half…) and then it just gets very dark… The ensemble cast is excellent, especially controversial actress Golshifteh Farahani! Winner of the Silver Bear in Berlin and top prize at Tribeca… One of my top favourite films at this year’s festival!

Show Me a Story: Documentary Shorts ( Various, 2007-2009) – I won’t comment extensively on each film but would like to say that the winner for Best Documentary short really did deserve it! Slaves from Sweden about the civil war in Sudan and its effects on the local children was truly compelling and beautifully animated. It was by far the best doco short screened in the program… yb box ended up being substituted by The Solitary Life of Cranes from the UK, as a result of China’s boycott campaign against the festival… My least favourite was Ma Bar. Some subtitles would have come in handy for Irish A Film from my Parish – 6 Farms and I was thoroughly disappointed with the quality of the copy for Travelling Camera and also appaulled at its subtitles… It was embarrassing, Brazil! Joyce Agape was very sweet too, director Hsieh Chun-Yi was there to personally introduce the film and I would like to give him my award for “most down-to-earth festival guest” for introducing his own work so humbly and honestly… In other words, the guy was not a wanker! Generally speaking, I wasn’t too impressed by the films curated for this program… Sorry! No star ratings for these shorts individually.

An Englishman in New York ( UK/USA, 2009) – Made-for-TV biopic about Quentin Crisp… I felt cheated not watching this on TV where it really belongs… It’s not awful but it’s your standard telefilm. The audience didn’t seem to mind it tho… Everyone loved it ( isn’t TV for the masses?)! It helps that Quentin Crisp is such an incredible individual and that John Hurt inhabits the character so damn well ( he got a Teddy in Berlin this year for his outstanding performance)… I’m not quite sure it’s incredibly relevant now that gay is no longer the new black… but I guess the one-liners kinda make up for it. Sex and the City fans will enjoy Cynthia Nixon as Penny Arcade… It was nice to see Swoosie Kurtz again and it looks like Jonathan Tucker is not just another pretty face after all… If you’re ever flicking your channel and this pops up remember what Quentin once said: “Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh.” and enjoy the movie.

Humpday ( USA, 2009) – Have you ever heard of the mumblecore movement? Well, I was never too impressed by much of what came out of it (mostly because it is ridiculously pretentious and uncertain) until I watched this one… I must also add it is the most accessible mumblecore feature I have seen, but that is not necessarily a bad thing… I wasn’t too sure of what to make out of it after reading the synopsis about two straight guys making an amateur gay porn together… so I was curious, but my expectations were incredibly low. After watching the very first scene I was already impressed… Lynn Shelton picked really good actors and considering that a lot of the film was improvised, it all just seemed to work so well… For a bromance, it is just too witty to be true and too funny for a flick lacking any offensive jokes ( hello Sacha Baron Cohen!). The audience really liked it too… This is really funny and recommended for people from any sexuality really… I think it’s an excellent date movie… I also love it as a study of male sexuality and friendship. Oh… dunno about you, but I spent the whole time trying to figure out where I had seen the blond guy that plays Andrew before… He’s from Blair Witch Project… Hehehe… This was really fun! One of my top favourite films at this year’s festival… Yes, I know I’ve been saying that a lot…

Yakuza Eiga ( Yakuza Eiga: Une Histoire Secrète du Cinéma Japonais, France, 2008) – I’m not really into the yakuza genre, but if you are, then you will absolutely love this… I was really just looking for an extra lesson on Japanese cinema and it looks like the yakuza was its secret lover! Plenty of comments and revelations from creative minds of the industry and the yakuzas who inspired and participated in the films. Insightful and free of aesthetic pretentions… It will satisfy anyone interested in the subject. Best seen on a telly screen…

Pierrot Le Fou ( France/Italy, 1965) – Anna Karina was kind enough to introduce this… She said they had a lot of fun on set and you can tell ( in spite of Anna and Godard getting divorced whilst shooting this)… I haven’t seen many Godard films so I don’t think it’s fair for me to say much… It’s too post modern for me… I find the whole idea of hating and mocking the bourgeoisie to end up being consumed by the bourgeoisie itself a really disgusting paradox… However, I must add that I do admire his spirit and ideas and over the years I am slowly becoming acquainted with his oeuvre. So, I hear this is one of his most important films as it marks the end of an era and the beginning of something new in his body of work… The film is very loosely inspired by Lionel White’s crime novel Obsession. But there’s not much point in trying to figure the plot out… Maybe it is best to regard it as a funny pop art masterpiece?! Maybe an abstract study of how men are guided by intellect and women by emotions?! ( something I don’t really agree with…) Let the bourgeoisie figure it all out… I absolutely love Godard’s take on the Algeria and Vietnam wars… If I were a teen in the 60s I think I would have loved this… Recommended for cool private school kids… Here’s what Godard once said about Pierrot Le Fou - "It is not really a film, it's an attempt at cinema. Life is the subject, with [Cinema]Scope and colour as its attributes...In short, life filling the screen as a tap fills a bathtub that is simultaneously emptying at the same rate."

Little Joe ( USA, 2009) – I missed the start of this due to the previous session’s very late start ( you’d think they’d skip the fucking ads, but no!)… Apparently there was some really cool animation at the start… Oh well, it’s MIFF! If you have never heard of Joe Dallesandro you might remember his crotch from that Rolling Stones’ album cover. Joe was quite possibly one of the hottest men that has ever lived ( please refer to photo above, also I made it sound like he is dead… he is NOT, but he is not that hot anymore…) and in this really small world we live in, it just happened that Andy Warhol and Dallesandro met one day… Shortly after, Joe and his body ( full frontals galore, viva the underground!) became the star of Andy Warhol/Paul Morrissey films. What followed is even more interesting… Joe went on to become a legend… especially for the queer world… Earlier this year he got himself a special Teddy award in Berlin. The doco is co-produced by the man himself and his daughter… Joe tells his own story with the help of some really…nice…archival footage. He’s an interesting guy, not just a delicious piece of meat… You just have to trust what he says because no one else is doing any talking. For some people this may be a little frustrating, but I thought it was actually quite an intimate way of doing things… and the clips really do help too… Isn’t there a saying about an image being worth a thousand words?!

Balibo ( Australia, 2009) – First of all… This is one of the best Australian movies of recent times… It really is! Having said that I can go on… The film tells of the Balibo Five, a tragic episode in which five Australian journalists were murdered (and tortured) by the Indonesian army during the Indonesian invasion of East Timor in late 1975. It also tells of Roger East, the forgotten sixth journalist that unsuccessfully went to their rescue. To enable Timorese audiences to connect with what would, otherwise, look like a movie about westerners saving the third world day, there is also the story of Juliana. Now an adult, she testifies to the Commission for the Reception, Truth and Reconciliation (CAVR) as a witness to East’s murder ( Juliana is a fictional character but an estimated 100 people witnessed Roger East being killed) and recalls her painful past and the struggle of her people ( up to 200 thousand Timorese were killed during the occupation).  Although the film is not completely faithful to actual events, it does recreate them the best way it possibly can ( most locations we see in the film are the actual locations where the real events took place). The cinematography and camerawork simulate the way footage was captured in the era, the soundtrack features the very talented Ego Lemos and all other technical aspects are top-notch. Anthony LaPaglia is superb in what he considers the best role he’s ever had and Oscar Isaac is captivating as a heroic José Ramos-Horta. Newcomer Bea Viegas also deserves a lot of credit for her thoroughly compelling performance as Juliana. Serving both as a tribute to the Balibo 5 and the Timorese people that perished during the political conflicts, Balibo is an entertaining political thriller that also happens to educate an audience that really needs to be aware that these atrocities happened close to home, that for many years the governments of Australia and Indonesia tried to conceal the truth and that just by being Australian, one is not necessarily safe in foreign territory… As for politically engaged Robert Connolly, this stands as his best film to date.

The Milk of Sorrow ( La Teta Asustada, Spain/Peru, 2009) – It’s a shame the perplexing title got lost in translation, literally La Teta Asustada means “The Frightened Tit”… I suppose that this would give people all sorts of wrong ideas about the film ( nudity and horror certainly building up expectations), so calling it The Milk of Sorrow is justified ( no nudity and horror in sight). Directed by Claudia Llosa and wonderfully acted by Magaly Solier, the film exposes the great cultural divide in Peru. The indigenous folks are poor and the white folks are rich, each seem to live in profoundly distinct worlds, physically, economically or culturally speaking. Fausta suffers from ‘la teta asustada’ - fear was breastfed to her through her mother’s milk… Her mother being a victim of rape and of all the terror and social instability that took over Peru from 1980 to 2000. Then, get ready for this, Fausta sticks a potato in her vagina to protect herself from violation… Not that Lima is still as awful a place as before. She gets a job working as a maid for a $$$ pianist in whose house she finally finds friendly male complicity in the gardener. I’m not telling you anymore! Full of symbolism, arty frames, exotic themes and fragmented narration, Llosa’s film may not be a groundbreaking cinematic experience but it is one of the best films to come out of South America recently… That conflicting colourful continent in which dictatorships and barbarisms happened not so long ago. It is no wonder films that try to understand such recent past ( not forgetting to follow formal exoticism) become brave examples to third world countries and get to take home Berlin’s Golden Bear… One of my top favourites at this year’s festival!

The Beaches of Agnès ( Les plages d'Agnès, France, 2008) – I love the “little old lady, pleasantly plump”, Agnès Varda! On the verge of her 80th birthday she decided to make a film about her life, the people who surrounded her all those years and her films, of course… A very personal collage, something Varda likes to call  cinécriture, is then created, before she forgets everything… She is alive, she remembers! One very personal and intimate documentary that is incredibly inventive and spontaneous… It is the kind of celebration of life you wish for all people to capture on film before they die. Surely it helps that Varda lived(s) quite the life, being a key figure of the French New Wave and having experienced important historical moments and movements. It helps that Jacques Demy was her soul mate, that Alain Resnais edited many of her films, that Jean Luc Godard was one of her buddies, she hung out with Jim Morrison and had no problems convincing the grumpy Harrison Ford to make an appearance… For a little old lady, Varda does wonders with her compact digital cameras and the best part of it is that she comes out very modest and as transparent as the ocean water of the beaches within her. One of my very top films at this year’s festival!

Sergio ( USA, 2009) – This is not to be confused with En Route to Baghdad, a film about the same Sérgio Vieira de Mello released in 2005 and seen only by a handful of people… for a number of reasons… it certainly had neither HBO’s nor BBC’s backing. Sergio is based on the book Chasing the Flame: Sergio Vieira de Mello and the Fight to Save the World by Pulitzer-Prize winner Samantha Power. Sérgio died in Iraq as the U.N. Secretary General’s Special Representative in 2003. You probably remember the attack to the UN headquarters at the time, but know very little about the man - a Brazilian diplomat who really did fight to save the world and he was always where the fight was being fought! A real life hero with movie star looks and all… Greg Barker’s doco not only pieces together Sérgio’s personal and professional life but also provides some rather tense moments by recreating the explosion and explaining the rescue in detail. Excellent documentary! It really needs to be seen… My first tears of this year’s festival rolled down my face here! Why do bad things only happen to good people?

The 10 Conditions of Love ( Australia, 2009) – Security was tight for this session…The talk of the town at this year’s festival… The Chinese government really didn’t want people to watch this and it is probably what would have happened if only they had kept quiet… People get really curious to see something they’re not supposed to, so the film, which was originally scheduled to screen only once, got plenty of extra screenings at the festival ( one at the Melbourne Town Hall with a very long queue that will be hard to forget!  Rebiya Kadeer herself in attendance!).  Seven Chinese films were withdrawn from the festival program at their filmmakers’ request ( they were probably pressured…) and MIFF’s website was hacked for days, driving quite a number of festival goers mad (Not me, I learnt one must book everything in advance…)! So what could be so terrible about the film and why would the Chinese government want to keep us from seeing it? While Rebiya Kadeer is seen as a leader, human rights advocate and activist for her people, the Uighur, she is nothing but a terrorist in the eyes of the Chinese government… The Uighurs are a Chinese Muslim minority in oil-rich Xinjiang/East Turkistan (please don’t hack me!) and have been persecuted for years… Yes, it’s kinda like another Tibet… Kadeer now lives in exile in the US but has been imprisoned before. Her sons are still in prison ( and will probably remain there for a long time!). What kind of mother sacrifices her family over her people? The doco directed by Jeff Daniels was made for TV ( not that SBS or ABC wanted to have anything to do with it before all the controversy…) , so it runs for only 54 minutes which means there was just not enough time to cover everything in depth… Budget issues as well as Daniels quickly becoming an unwelcome visitor in China also keep the film from being a lot better than it actually is… Overhyped or not, it really shows the power of film and now a lot more people know about the struggle of the Uighurs. It’s just ironic that the Chinese government triggered the best marketing campaign Jeff Daniels could have hoped for… The stars below rate the film itself… For its social impact I’d give it 5 stars any time!

Ecstasy of the Angels ( Tenshi no kôkotsu, Japan, 1972) - Kôji Wakamatsu is a highly controversial artist in Japan and one of the most acclaimed pinku eiga directors of all time. The man has got a taste for elaborate shots, great music, nice cinematography, violence, war, sex and radical political views... He is
an anarchist who managed to produce more than 100 films in his homeland. He's attracted attention from film festivals all around the globe and has got quite a cult following. It was a tough one hour and half for me, but I won't really blame Wakamatsu for that... It's just this was too much to handle as my 5th film of the day...Think Jean-Luc Godard gone politically wild on a no-budget sex film... It is understandably a cult classic and Wakamatsu obviously does not give a shit about convention!!! Audaciously sexy, outrageously political and kinda fun. Not recommended for everyone tho! Wanna have a look? It's pretty hard to find but you can download it here!

Sweet Rush ( Tatarak, Poland 2009) – The projectionist fucked up big time during this session so there was an unpredicted intermission of 7 minutes… I have never seen any of Andrzej Wajda’s films before so I wasn’t too sure of what to expect here. Sweet Rush is a film about death… or rather 3 films about death within the same film. It is a bit annoying and arty farty for that reason… Mixing a monologue, a “making off” of the film itself and the adaptation of a short story just makes it really hard for audiences to engage… but it did help the film get the Alfred Bauer Award in Berlin. Krystyna Janda is outstanding in what is obviously a very personal performance following the death of her own husband. Great cinematography, music score and cannot  forget to mention the hot Polish guy in yellow speedos to all the older ladies out there… 

All About Actresses ( Le bal des actrices, France, 2009) - Maïwenn Le Besco’s film is inspired by her own trials and tribulations as a working actress in France. Here she mixes a fake documentary, multicoloured musical numbers and French divas to unveil what happens behind the scenes of a relentless industry. There are some really talented women cast here so that’s good enough a reason to see it… Jeanne Balibar, Romane Bohringer, Julie Depardieu, Mélanie Doutey, Marina Foïs, Estelle Lefébure, Lin Dan Pham, Charlotte Rampling, Muriel Robin, Karin Viard, Karole Rocher, Le Besco herself and even rapper Joey Starr. So it is quite a team indeed! Some very funny scenes and a truly captivating film. Audience was pretty happy with it at the end… Perfect for an afternoon… Not to be taken too seriously, especially when it comes to its musical numbers.

Anna ( France, 1967) – I couldn’t really miss the opportunity to watch this on a big screen (and at very loud volume)… I am not a big Serge Gainsbourg fan, but Anna Karina is irresistible and the 60s were a really cool time for musical comedies. I loved the silly plot, the bizarre costumes, the psychedelic elements and a very young Marianne Faithfull! It is hard to believe this was a téléfilm… if one considers the amount of crap we have to put up with on telly these days! A very fun and visually stimulating portrait of the era. Anna Karina introduced the film to top it all off… She was very sweet, a bit shy and very humble. Many years may have gone by, but her charisma is still there (intact). Unfortunately, one can’t say the same about her voice… Too many cigarettes on and off screen! Although Anna is not really my piece of cake, I cannot deny how historically important and unforgettable it is…

Thirst ( Bakjwi, South Korea/USA, 2009) – Chan-Wook Park to me is synonymous with satisfaction guaranteed… Even when it comes to a “vampire romance” flick a bit on the melodrama side ( and there is a lot of that coming our ways, believe me, buy some garlic! Not that it’d work for this one )… I don’t mind long films either, specially when they are fun! Yes, fun! Tech credits and production design are very strong ( something one would expect when giants CJ Entertainment and Universal unite – for the first time ever). For Park, who’s always been interested in ethical dilemmas, the story of a priest turned into a vampire fits the purpose perfectly… ( and so does adultery and everything else)! The script is inspired by Émile Zola’s Thérèse Raquin. Fantastic acting from Korean superstar Song Kang-ho and model turned (very good) actress Kim Ok-vin… Expect lovely sex scenes, plenty of religious sub context, exhaustive use of blood and the cutest vampire couple to ever hit our screens… Winner of the Grand Jury Prize at Cannes and one of my top favourites at this year’s festival! 

Eden Log ( France, 2007) -  I missed the first few minutes of this because of Thirst being a bit too long and most other MIFF sessions running late… I wouldn’t normally watch a film if I ever miss the very start of it but I was truly intrigued to see what this looked like… Once I sat down I had a hard time trying to figure out what the… was going on and I was blaming it all on myself for having missed the very start, but apparently nobody knew what the… was going either… That was sort of the point… So I think it’s better if I don’t say too much… The main character awakes in an unknown place and takes the audience in a journey of self discovery with him… While some audience members will probably enjoy the ride, most are likely to get lost along the way… With dialogue being kept to a minimum, some of the acting quite irregular and overwhelming visuals, it’s hard to get the story… This world created by Franck Vestiel is very strange and sinister, devoid of any colour… Everything is silver, black or white… It really does look far out! The sound design helps tremendously as well… Vestiel has accomplished something quite visionary on a very tight little budget. Sci fi fans, video game lovers and selected environmentalists might enjoy watching this… I didn’t particularly like it that much but will keep my eyes on Vestiel.

It will be virtually impossible to review films on a daily basis, but keep checking... At some point, all of my personal opinions on the films I see will be posted here...

Here is the final Diwali video… Feio, the beautiful dog, and I make a cameo appearance (tho you might struggle to spot Feio having beer cos the video got a bit darker on YouTube)… Also, be warned… the tune gets stuck in your head… Rosa Mimosa and Elena, you are beautiful and sound like angels! Miss you both! Thanks again, Lena! You did a great job even if you couldn’t find the zoom!

Did you read my post about Rishikesh? Remember those videos I couldn’t get from Elena and Rosa entertaining us with their spontaneous music? Well, here is one of them… I guess there is always a chance, if it happened at Last Chance! Thanks, Lena!

Hua Hin - Thailand 

I was determined to make the most out of my last week away in the world before returning to my 'real world' in Australia. Bangkok's airport was impressive... I wasn't expecting it to be that big or cool... Actually, I was expecting to be deported... Brazil is in the list of countries which have an arrangement with Thailand so that we can enter the country without a visa if we ain't staying for too long... I checked all of that before boarding my plane there... However, inside the aircraft we were given the arrival card and that required a visa number which I didn't have! So I thought I'd fucked up pretty badly... I hate airports and customs officials... I really didn't want my holiday to be cut short, even if it was only by a week...

Perceptibily there is no surprise element to what happened next... Otherwise I wouldn't be here blogging about Thailand... I was right and didn't need a visa. They were extremely nice people! I had NEVER EVER seen friendly customs officials before! They helped me find my way to Hua Hin... It was so hot! I loved public transport there... I never had to wait! And the paper tickets on the bus were the coolest! I brought all of mine back and will do some sort of artwork with it later... As a matter of fact, I brought transport tickets from all my destinations... I want to always remember these 6 months... They were the best thing that has ever happened to me. And the Thais are the best people I have come across so far... I love people who can smile and Thailand is the kingdom of smiles!

I was heading to Hua Hin because of couchsurfing again... I wanted to go to the beach and Hua Hin had one so that was good enough a reason to convince me. That was also where my Thai host lived... Troy... well, not actually, but that was his English name.

So 70 Years Ago

Hua Hin used to be a top vacation spot with the Royal Family and rich Bangkok residents back in the day (and some would say still today...). It just happens to be close to Bangkok (about 200 km) and surely it must have looked nice then... One thing I can assure you it still remains the same would be the love and devotion they have for their royal family! If only our presidents and prime ministers got the same....

I wasn't too impressed by the beach there... Above all, I didn't really appreciate all the dead fish floating on the shore or edover the sand... If they were dead then I reckoned I could probably have died if I swam there too... Ironically, I spent my whole time in Hua Hin trying to buy some beach clothes ( a very bad idea, considering things there are all selling at tourist prices) and only made it to the beach on my last day there. I had all the gear I needed but couldn't really cope with their beaches. So if you're thinking about hitting the sea in Thailand, then you should head further south like everyone else or drive a few more hours away from Bangkok... Even better you could always try staying at one of the luxurious hotels and enjoy their awesome pools!

Hua Hin Fun Times

Despite its dreadful beaches, Hua Hin was pretty cool... Lots of smoothies (with fresh, delicious and organic fruit!) and airconditioning for me! I also went and checked out the nightlife on my first night there... Asian pop!!! You have to love it... and how could you not?! The whisky is so cheap and you buy by the bottle or half a bottle even... The way to travel around town? On the back of a motorcycle (no helmets!)... I was shitting myself the whole time, of course!!! But one could always trust my Hua Hin crew... It was a fun first night!

Then, of course, I got lucky again... I was in town for the Hua Hin Food Festival... Awesome Thai Food everywhere... Pretty spicy too! Nothing like impressing the locals and sweating it all away... The night was not complete without a Beauty Pageant!!!

Then it was time to leave Hua Hin and hit Bangkok! Hua Hin is a perfect break for anyone who wants to stay far away from the chaos in Bangkok... There's plenty to see and do... I would have loved to have seen the waterfalls around there, they were not too far away but I couldn't make it... Please don't ask me to explain why... Hehehe... 

Bangkok - Thailand

Bangkok is an awesome metropolis! It is hard to tell exactly how many millions of people are living there but there let's just say there are enough people... Don't worry! Public transport is awesome and it's easy to get around... Although I wouldn't really want to be driving a car... Yes, one can expect traffic jams, but I sort of like being stuck in traffic if I'm visiting somewhere! You should trust Lonely Planet when they say Bangkok is never boring ( but don't trust them for anything else...)!

All I really cared about during my stay there was partying! Those were my last days of fun... So I only came out at night! Bangkok has an incredible nightlife but you must hit the right spot at an appropriate night... So I started with (in)famous Patgong!!! Prostitutes, ladyboys and a cool nightmarket where you'll be offered "Sex DVD!" a lot!!! I couldn't really bring myself to go in and watch any live sex shows neither with the girls nor with the boys but you can still spot some of the action if you look through the doors... They will also try and force you to go in... I was grabbed by four guys and they tried to throw me inside one of the clubs but I am not nto watching people fuck and being scammed... Thanks! Maybe if I were an old fat American bastard?! Sure! But I was not interested... I don't even like porn... I was also given pictures of boys and girls... I could have chosen one and took them home with me... But then again... "I'm not that horny, thanks!" I was just having a look around and tried really hard to understand how there could be some many families hanging out there, doing their bit of shopping and not minding all the pussy and cock around... It was kinda of surreal... After some extraordinary finds at the markets ( there are some really talented designers selling stuff that is really cheap and cool) it was time to finally hit my first club! Lucifer!!! What a name... and the devil himself was there to greet me at the door! Unfortunately, not many people wanted to play in hell that night but still it was hella fun!

If you wanna get trendy and be one of the cool kids then you cannot miss out on the Bed Supperclub. Visit their website and check what's on! It is worth a look... There are plenty of wanky people and no photos are allowed inside... You might also find a superstar DJ on their line up and why not try their surprising dinners (4 courses, or was it 5???) if you can afford it?! If worst comes to worse you can always appreciate the archicteture! The club looks like a spaceship from the outside and inside the feeling ain't much different... War of the Worlds meets Star Trek... oh, and there are plenty of beds! Yes, white huge comfy beds with pillows and everything! So you can sit down, lay down, relax and order your drinks or go dancing like everyone else, there are two dancefloors to choose from! If you like it too much you can buy one of their funny shirts as a souvenir... I had loads of caipirinhas and they went down very well when the DJ spinned some baile funk... It is a small world, I tell you! It is a wonderful world...  

I also ended up at what looked like an S&M club one night... It was an accident... It was pretty cool, lots of dancing cages and some really beautiful go-go girls... The music was incredible! Unfortunately, we were gatecrashing a private function and didn't get full access to the place... I think it was called Diva... It's a bit overpriced but they are usually open til very late and their shows are very sexy (but sexy in a good way)... I also tried to check out some of the gay spots... I didn't get very lucky  at DJ Station cos my friend didn't have his ID on him... They were pretty strict about it... And so should they... They're very popular and always overcrowded so if shit hits the fan then shit really hit the fan! Expect metal detectors and no bags allowed inside! So we went to G.O.D. (Guys On Display) instead... It was just like any other gay club anywhere else really... It was pretty crowded and the music was too gay... I was probably the only person still wearing a shirt inside... Hehehe... Very sweaty and perfect for queens who like to show off their muscles and dance moves on top of podiums...

Bangkok is also the perfect place for any shopaholic! You're best served visiting their night markets... They're everywhere but locals know where to go to get the real deal so join 'em or ask around! There's also MBK, where you'll find all tourists in town, a perfect place if you wanna stalk the other foreigner you met the night before. So if you forgot to take note of email, Facebook, mobile or whatever it is you use to keep in touch with people today... this is your perfect opportunity to bump into them... All the whiteys are there at some point of their stay... I was very happy to be able to buy some clothes, considering I had practically nothing left to wear and would already start workin' just the next day after getting to Oz... I managed to get some cool stuff too (in a record 2 hours, almost missed my flight but Qantas was late, phewww!)! You know when everyone asks you where you got that little something?! The best part is that it doesn't cost much and the worst part is that it doesn't last that long... Fair deal!

Before I left Thailand I had one last little visit... It was a daytrip, a long one... to an ancient little town...

Ayutthaya - Thailand

Ayutthaya used to be the Paris of Asia in the 1600s... Nowadays you will only find ruins and a relatively quiet little town just under an hour away from Bangkok! We hired a couple of bikes and pedalled all around... It is definitely the best way to see Aayutthaya! You could also jump on and ride some elephants if that is your sort of thing but I didn't really think it was the appropriate thing to do... I could use the exercise and spare the animals... I actually hadn't been on a bike for so long... It was such a nice day! There are lots of temples and sights... So we just got a little map and went exploring! It was kinda fun getting lost and ending up somewhere else... We had a hard time trying to find the Sleeping Buddha but there were plenty of interesting things along the way...

When we finally got there... There was fresh coconut water on sale! Perfect! Ayutthaya was an awesome little break, it was like we were inside an adventure film... The local shops and restaurants are all run by families so the food is awesome and the prices are even better! Absolutely loved it and recommend it to anyone bored in Bangkok! It is just a daytrip! When we got back to Bangkok we even had time for some drinks on my last night away...  

"All things come to an end" they say... but I just haven't really had enough of this small world of ours! So I'm sure I'll see you on the road again!!! Thailand is always a happy ending!

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 Final Podcast Episode 

Trans Hell Express 

First things first... My train ride from Rishikesh to Mumbai was from hell...

I went and saw a travel agent about getting a train from Rishikesh to Mumbai and because it was just after Diwali there were no seats available in most services... But they found me an "emergency seat" somewhere and told me it was going to be a bit more expensive than usual... It turned out that it was still extremely cheap and I thought it was the best bargain ever! I had very little money so I just agreed to it and bought myself the ride... I didn't really bother asking much about the journey... I was only worried about getting to Mumbai in time for my flight out of India at that stage...

When I got to the station it was hella busy, the train was just 5 minutes late... There were monkeys hanging out... I looked for sleeper class, that was my ticket... Sleeper class is the worst way to travel in India and it is also the way most locals travel, I was in for the real thing... No air conditioning, no security, no gourmet services or European style toilets... no broadband, no laptop plugs... I thought it was a 26-hour journey and was already feeling it was going to be a little tough... Inside, I got the wrong seat, got asked to move and had all passengers staring at me because I was the ONLY westerner travelling with them... They seemed perplexed and couldn't understand why I wasn't on first class or AC classes like most other foreigners... They seemed worried about me... I felt welcome but could sense they were trying to protect me... I felt tense, what could be so bad about sleeper class?

The answer came quickly...

I kept spotting mice in the carriage... I lost count of how many I saw, my luggage under the seat was their playground... They were really really dirty little black mice... You know, for some people in India they are holy little animals... Then I went to the toilet and let's just say I didn't want to go back in there ever again... So I vowed not to eat or drink much for the trip... Back in my seat I tried to keep myself entertained with my MP3 player but that died shortly after we left... I travelled with nine other people sitting next to me, they were friendly, offered me food all the time and made sure I had a bed when it was time to sleep. I got the top bed and that came with three fans on top of it... If I moved much at night during my sleep I could end up getting my hair tangled or a finger, perhaps a toe, chopped off... Nice! I am not complaining, at the very least, it wasn't too hot!

The train would stop in little towns all the time... Each time it stopped people would jump in selling all sorts of things... From bananas to padlocks, from samosas to radios... Many people would also jump in for a free ride... There were inspectors around but they didn't show up more than once... It was heartbreaking to see the young lady travelling with her baby sitting with us being kicked out of her seat... She travelled with her infant sitting on the floor next to the toilet door for the rest of the time... At one point, some trannies came in... They slapped men until they gave them money... It was really funny! They seemed so powerful and so unashamed and they didn't see me! I am sure they would have kept slapping me forever because I was one broke western motherfucker! 

Then the scariest moment of my entire world trip took place... I thought my time had come! In the middle of the night, somewhere... In the middle of nowhere, the train stopped... I couldn't see a damn thing outside so dark a night it was, but I could hear voices shouting... I had no idea what was being said but whoever those people were they sounded very angry! Then all of the passengers inside looked scared, everyone started closing their windows desperately... They were in panic... They were hiding and putting their heads down, trying to protect themselves... Rocks were thrown at us... The voices sounded like they were coming closer... I didn't know what was happening and was shitting myself just from seeing everyone shitting themselves... I thought if those people got inside our carriage they were gonna kill everyone... I thought I was going to die... I didn't even understand why all that was happening but I could see the fear in peoples' faces and it looked like the end was near... Fortunately, the train started moving again and people inside looked relieved and they were smiling at each other... My heart was pumping fast to remind me I was still alive... Fuuuuuck me... Phew!

In the morning, I realised that my 26-hour trip was actually a 52-hour journey... I had to stay inside that train for yet another day... I almost cried... But what was the point in that? Later, when I finally arrived in Mumbai I was told I jumped aboard the worst train line in the whole of India... So my advice to anyone travelling long distances is to plan and book ahead... Also, there are wonderful train services available... Just make sure you choose the right one and don't always rely on a travel agent for that...

Don't be me... I am the human version of a fuck-up!

And the Oscar Goes To...  

I arrived in Mumbai around 4 a.m. which is always a great time to turn up at a stranger's door. Yes, I went couchsurfing again...  At the time, I had no idea I was about to stay at one of the locations featured in Slumdog Millionaire... It was pitch black and I couldn't see the huge rock formation that stood in front of our building ( it houses a temple on top)... I knew Sushma would have been asleep and felt horrible about having to wake her up... But what else could I have done? I ended up staying with one of Sushma's friends, Anand, and they were all wonderful people (all involved in the film industry, it is Mumbai, after all)! I had the best time... Even took some dance lessons...

मुंबई

Mumbai is the biggest city in India... It reminded me of Sao Paulo. I wasn't staying for very long so I wasn't too worried about seeing things because it would be impossible to fit everything in. So I just spent most of my time shopping... I really needed to get some clothes for the local hot weather and for Thailand so I did quite a bit of that. Thankfully, Sushma came with me and took me to the right spots and helped me negotiate prices at the shops. In one of the shops I got asked if I wanted to look like Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise or Shahrukh Khan... all I had to do to be like them was to buy a pair of fake Billabong shorts... Not my sort of fashion and I wasn't particularly interested in looking like anybody else but me.

I went to see the touristy area where the Gateway of India is located - also where the terrorist attacks happened a few weeks after I'd been there - It was pretty obvious for me that if shit ever had to happen in Mumbai it would happen there... I didn't even bother going inside Cafe Leopold because I wasn't in India to enjoy a Heineken in the company of Anglos. What shocked me the most about the area was that around the luxurious hotels there were hundreds of beggars, all of whom spoke perfect English, and by perfect I mean some sounded a lot better than highly educated Indians I met while I was there... So that was really something... It meant that they had been around there for ages, generations... I took a few pictures and took off... It is a nice place for a stroll. Here is a picture I took of the area when the rather expensive hotels were still looking very good.

I adored Mumbai... It is exciting... My favourite thing was catching the city train! Trying to figure out where to buy a ticket, what ticket to get and most importantly... How the hell does one get in a carriage??? There are so many people inside them that some were hanging out the door and all they were using to make sure they didn't fall off was their little finger... Then there are empty first class carriages and women-only carriages... I felt so stupid not knowing where to go and what to do... People inside the trains were nice, they helped each other and kept a friendly face on at all times... So not like a Monday morning on public transport anywhere western... It was great fun! There's plenty of nice food at affordable prices everywhere and I'm sure there's a wonderful nightlife too... Unfortunately I didn't get to party during my stay, a mistake I won't make next time.

India was definitely the best part of my trip... It is such a complex country that it felt like a different planet to me... 2 weeks was just not long enough at all and not enough time to digest all I saw... I want to return and see more of it... It is so different everywhere you go... I suppose what I loved the most was that there is very little room for bullshit and everything is in your face... You can't hide from evil while you're there but you must appreciate the good things! It is all about survival... 

    ACCESS ALL MUMBAI PHOTOS HERE

Next up all about Thailand, the last stop!!! ( including a Portuguese podcast of India and Thailand adventures...)

You Give Me Fever When I Have No Bananas

After muchos wild partyingz in Noida I decided to head North... I wasn't really sure of where to go so I just followed Lena, a lovely Russian being that turned up at H100 one early morning. We caught a bus and it took us a good nine hours to reach Rishikesh from Noida... Unfortunately for my health, pretty much all the windows of our bus were broken so let's just say it was a bit cold overnight with all the wind coming in... I had a warm jacket but I should've really gotten my hands on some blankets like the other fellow local passengers did... Lena and I had to stick very close to each other to keep warm... Very sweet and human but by the time I got to Rishikesh I was burning hot with a fever... Did I mention sweating my life away? I was completely delirious... We got off the bus and had a walk to our guesthouse... The sun was rising and that holy city looked absolutely beautiful... The magnitude of the Ganga river made me forget about my poor current state... I was in the Himalayas!!!

A perfect moment until I saw the monkeys... Yes, I'm chickenshit and especially when I am delirious... I was afraid the monkeys would attack just because all animals do it to me when they get a chance... I once was attacked by a chicken when I was about four, maybe that explains a lot... Maybe not... So I did what all the books I read had told me... I didn't look at the monkeys in the eye, I avoided eye contact at all costs, I tried to hide my bags from them, I didn't laugh (how could I?) and just kept as quiet as I possibly could... Then, about a dozen of them approached me...

It was my lucky day... They didn't care about me... I was safe! Phewww!  

Like a Yogi

So what does one do in a holy city after they have recovered? Mind you there is no alcohol, meat or eggs for sale...

What did the Beatles do in the late sixties when they were there to escape material wealth and the pressures of celebrity? They wrote over 40 songs, took a lot of drugs and studied transcendental meditation... Kate Winslet? I bet she was busy doing research for her role in Holy Smoke. A baba probably would have guessed the Oscar was gonna be hers this year... Would they have told her? Hahaha... Well, I was in the Yoga capital of India so obviously I had to finally take a yoga class... I had always been very scared of attending one because when I tried it in the past I had fits of laughter when people started hmmmmmmmmmmmming their mantras and also I was afraid to fart outloud like everybody else did. Luckily, there was none of that on my first class... Well, no farting... There were fits of laughter tho, we had to make animal sounds but it was ok... everybody laughed... My teacher was cool, look at him:  

The Happiest Diwali 

Not that I had planned it but I was in India for one of the biggest Hindu festivals there, Diwali, the Festival of Lights. It goes for five days but the third day, Lakshmi Puja is the most important of all. There is quite a lot of history behind it and many Hindu religious legends feature but, in a nutshell, it celebrates the victory of good over evil. People decorate their houses with diyas (lamps), electric lamps, clay lamps... They invite loved ones over for a feast, exchange presents and... yes, there are sweets... Delicious sweets!!! One cannot forget the firecrackers and the fireworks (that go on all night long!)... Incredible atmosphere! Here is a little poem by an unknown writer: 

As echelons of zillion lights adorn,
and echoes of triumph and thunder swarm,
watching even a tiny gleam perform,
devoring ill,
sparkling joy despite forlorn,
exhorts a hearty & happy year merely born

The lovely crew I was hanging out with adapted the traditions a little bit... For us it was a party... We dressed up, did a bit of face painting and went out on the streets with whistles wishing everyone a Happy Diwali! We even crashed a party at some guesthouse and it was quite funny... They were all sitting in the dark, drinking tea and then we turned up loud and colourful... All we could see were flashes because everyone that a had a camera started taking pictures... They weren't expecting anything like that during our visit. We hung out at different guesthouses all night... People would take turns and play the guitar, drums and the harmonica... Rosa Mimosa and Elena would sing beautifully ( I had it on video but unfortunately I accidentally deleted them from my camera and can't share them with you)... It was probably the Happiest New Year celebration I had in a while...

Rishikesh was truly special... Walking around the streets and hanging out with babas drinking chai and getting to learn about their spiritual pursuits (when they weren't trying to smoke hash discreetly) whilst being surrounded by the foothills of the Himalayas was just out of this world...

There are lots of tourists (both Indian and international) in some particular areas and most of them seem to be there to meditate or learn yoga. Some of these people can be quite annoying... I'll give you an example... We were having lunch at a little restaurant one day and I had to hear an American guy going on and on about hunger being an emotional state and that no one really needed to eat... He was doing that at a restaurant whilst having lunch himself... and he would not shut up about it... (!!!) Another thing I found funny was that most of the hippie looking people there were being funded by "Mum and Daddy International Bank" which I find is always a great excuse to start ranting about the fucked up state of the world and look crazy in the coconut... It's not like they will ever have to endure all the poverty they see right in front of them or even work one day... So beware...

Luckily, I found some really wonderful people! I feel so privileged to have met them and miss them heaps! Thanks to all of you for being there sharing Rishikesh with me!!!

Here's some footage featuring Rishikesh superstars... directed by Lena... filmed shortly after my departure to Mumbai... (by the way, that's up next!)

VIEW ALL RISHIKESH PHOTOS 

Inside the tiny vehicle I was in... I took off not knowing what I was gonna see... I was in India... I could hear it! It was about 4 a.m. but the traffic was an absolute shocker! I was trying to understand what was the logic behind it all...

Why were there 7 cars travelling side by side on a 3 lane way? Why would my driver just squeeze in wherever he could? Why was the side mirror of the car on the right so next to my ear? Why was there a cow on my left so next to me? Why didn't the man that just ran in front of all those cars get hit by one? Why is it taking so long? What happens if an emergency vehicle needs to get through? How the fuck do these cars don't crash? Why do they use their horns so much? Will it ever stop? Will I go crazy? Is it me or just my imagination that sees the request "horn please" at the back of every truck? If it is like this at 4 a.m. what is rush hour gonna be like? Is he going the right way?

Then I just thought that there were over one billion people living in India... and that like me they needed to get somewhere too... No matter how.

So we get to Noida... We can't find the address... There is no phone number to contact my hosts... The driver kept asking around... People pointed us in all sorts of different directions... We were lost for over one hour when we finally got close to where we were supposed to be... Only this time around when my driver got out of the car to ask for help, two men approached and one held a big-fuck-off-piece-of-wood... I didn't, for a minute, think that they were going to hit me but I was certain that they would kill the guy that was driving my car... Thankfully, that didn't happen... They were security and they told us exactly where we needed to go! It was pretty late... I only wondered if my hosts were still awake... If they really existed... If they were ready for me... If you could still hear all the horn punchin' from their home...

H100 - House of Joy  

As soon as the driver stopped, H100's door opened... Derek, the guy that looked like the guy on the couchsurfing site (phew!) had his arms up in the air... He pronounced my name perfectly and didn't look like he had been sleeping... Then Leo, yes, another Leo, smiled at me and that was it... I was the first couch surfer in H100... The most welcoming home in all of Noida... Before I got the chance to sit down I was offered some aussie beer... and guess what beer it was??? Foster's!!! Oh... how ironic... and how thoughtful of them! We sat down, we talked a lot, mostly about films and German criminals, we listened to music... These were some really good people! They had a party set up for the following night and more guests were arriving...

Leaving H100 was a hard thing to do... There was wireless broadband internet, good tunes playing, good food and good people constantly in and out of the doors... There were parties every night, those included YouTube screenings and random dancing moments... All sorts of people came to the house, from all sorts of different places... It was just too good! That is why I didn't go see Delhi... The locals in Noida were nice too... I remember how random people would just come up and tell you really deep and meaningful messages, share little lessons they had learnt in life... So doing simple things like going to get more beer, or some food was always extraordinary because of all the people you'd meet... There were not many tourists around so we got all the attention and the boys were quite popular in the area as they had been living there for months and even managed the language...  

Most of the people that hung out at H100 when I was there were film students... So I was pretty happy to be around... Have a look at some of their work...

Delhi - India

The only I saw of Delhi was a nightclub (typical, really)... I don't know its name or where it was... I was invited to Sosthene's birthday party, he was from Ivory Coast and so were most of his guests... Really funky people that love to smile... When we got to the club in Delhi we seemed to be on the guestlist, we walked in and I could not believe how luxurious that place was... We headed to some sort of lounge area... People sitting there were all having dinner and being served by well trained waiters and waitresses in stylish uniforms. I didn't even care to look at prices or the menu... I knew it would cost me a fortune. I just followed instructions... 

I was given a green bracelet and that meant I could drink all the beer I could get within a certain time. I watched the waiters panic when they looked at the amount of empty bottles at our table... I also watched their looks of disapproval when Lena and Derek started dancing there... All the other tables around us were occupied by upper middle class and rich young Indians that also disapproved of our behaviour... at first... cos later on everyone jumped up to dance in that non-dancing spot. It was fun to watch a space that was tense with everyone competing to "be seen" turn into a fun unprententious dancefloor. Oh them crazy westerners!

The area upstairs was an open-air rooftop... It was pretty crowded and it was a VIP dancefloor... The music was out of this world, just too good to be true... I tried to grab the DJ's name but it was impossible to move around... let alone talk and be heard... He was playing electro (!) and there seemed to be a lot of enthusiasts there! There were all sorts of people - from local trendoids to drunk western business men - and all hands were up in the air! I couldn't believe my eyes or my ears... When I tried to go back up a second time, a bouncer didn't allow it... Apparently I needed to have an extra stamp?! a VIP stamp?! I already had about 3 stamps and a bracelet...and I had already been upstairs?! What stamp??? I had just learnt bureaucracy is a constant in India... I couldn't be bothered...

We also visited another club that night... It was under a 5 star hotel... I can't remember the name... When we got there they confiscated my camera... No photos were allowed inside... Security was very tight... Inside they were playing psytrance... So I don't really need to say how high and drunk some of the people were... In the smoking room I heard of drug fuelled parties and watched others get invited to them... I couldn't quite fit in that room somehow... I headed back to the dancefloor and we partied til early in the morning...

It was all I got to see of Delhi... a night of luxury and constrast.  

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Then I hit Rishikesh... that's coming soon...

I flew business class to Finland... courtesy of the lovely Polish check-in lady that felt very sorry for me when I told her the reason why I had very little luggage was because someone took my 40kgs away from me in Germany... She was also very excited about the fact I had been travelling the world and told me she would get me a really comfy seat for that flight... See, I love the Poles! Inside the aircraft I couldn't believe how good the seat was... and also had a little trouble trying to figure out where everything was with so many buttons and compartments at hand. Unfortunately it was only a short flight... so not a lot of time to indulge in a world I didn't really belong to. I kept in mind I would tell that story at the check-in for every flight I had left because back then I thought it would work... It turns out it did not... I really don't get to abuse my luck... I should've known!

Ms. Itknonen

For my stay in Helsinki (48 hours only!) I once again played the couchsurfer... I am thankful that Katri took me in because once again it was very short notice from me! We got to hang out quite a bit because it was pretty wet outside to go out and play... and did I mention COLD?! So yep, lots of snacks, interwebs, Friends (yes, the series) and general debauchery. Lots of planning too... As usual I was more interested in Helsinki's nightlife than anything... After all it was my last weekend in Europe and I take any excuse to party...

Valokarnevaali  

Keeping the tradition of finding major events at my destinations by pure luck, I found out I had made to Helsinki just in time to enjoy the very last day of their Carnival of Lights. Linnanmäki is an amusement park that helps raise funds for child welfare work in Finland... The Carnival of Lights is the last chance the Finns get to enjoy lovely  rides before winter hits them hard and they have to close... It is a beautiful autumn out there and there are plenty of lights and shows to enjoy! Katri was keen on going back to take some photos of fire acrobats she had seen prior that week and I was keen on riding rollercoasters... There were many... and the park was pretty empty which meant I got to ride them over and over again, sometimes all by myself... Embarassing to the point I made friends with a lot of kids who would scream everytime they saw me around... I think they were able to find inspiration in a retarded grown up that seemed to be having just as much fun as they did up and down the rollercoasters in 5 degrees Celsius temperatures. I totally adore rollercoaster rides... something the people who were in charge of the rollercoasters were able to pick up so they kept offering me extra rides and I was happy to accept them... I am sure they thought it was the first time I had seen a rollercoaster in my life and that I was "special" to say the least... I didn't care... A little Peter Pan Syndrome has never killed anyone... 

Architecture in Helsinki 

Noooo, not the band! Actually, I have spread the word around in Finland... They are not very aware of the existence of the aussie group but I did show them how they could do the whirlwind and I think they love it... But, literally speaking, Helsinki is beautiful! I didn't get to see much but when the sun came out I ran exploring...

Nightlife

Oh where to go??? Everyone kept telling me to go to Don't Tell Mother, known by the locals as DTM... So off we went... There was a London crew from the (in)famous Salvation night putting the music on... How good is that name for a gay club?! The Finns are hot and they love to party! The dancefloor was packed and it was a lot of fun... I loved that people dressed up and there was a bit of everything... from a dominatrix in black leather to haute couture... Only problem??? The night in Helsinki ends at 4a.m. So it is a bit like rush hour trying to get home when they thrown everyone out from every single venue in town... Everybody hits the streets... Lots of drunken behaviour... People pissing in corners, lots of fights breaking out and you know what else... I was sad to be going home that early... but regulations are regulations and 4 a.m. it's not too bad...  Also I must say that they had the best smoking room ever... It was designed like a prison cell and there was a phone like the ones we see in films when they have someone visiting and there's the glass in between with the phone, you know what I mean?! So smokers can speak to their non-smoking friends through the device... There is also a nightvision camera and what goes on inside is screened to the people outside... So for those who think they're in the dark and no one can see them, well... don't feel people up and don't get too hot in there or you could be the Paris Hilton of the night.

The next night much to Katri's surprise I wanted to go out again! "ON A SUNDAY???" she asked... and I felt terribly bad because for me going out on Sundays is routine and Mondays are never blue either... Huahauhauaha... So we decided to check We Got Beef. It was a bit bizarre, there were a lot of Goths and some guy from some Finnish metal band... They also had the best cider I have ever had in my life... To die for! I didn't even bother asking where their beef was...

Orkut and Näkemiin 

Absolutely love Finland... I learnt orkut means orgasm, I learnt that cows and cars are sort of related in their language and that they have a lot of young folks running for their elections... 48 hours was just not enough and I vow to return for some more fun in the best named bars in the world serving the best cider ever and the sexy people that love to dance til the clock hits 4 a.m. Also, thank you very much Katri for showing me Helsinki like the true Helsinki it is... Vinaka sara vakalevu!!!

Now here is a lovely video I made of Helsinki... Thanks to Katri for letting me use her camera... I had run out of batteries on mine...

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All about India is coming next...

On my visit to the Centre for Contemporary Art, at Ujazdowski Castle, I got to see Fly by Yoko Ono. John Lennon helped her out in the making and the autobiographical film is greatly influenced by Andy Warhol. Here is an excerpt I found on YouTube...